Cubs win the World Series and Jesus rises from the dead

Here’s something funny for you. As the new baseball season gets into full swing, I keep hearing people talking about how the Chicago Cubs won the World Series two years ago. HaHaHaHa!

I don’t know what medications they’re taking, but the Cubs winning the World Series?! LOL! Impossible! It never happened, people. You’re delusional. Come on back to the real world now, and face the facts that the lovable losers will always be losers.

So, there were some 38,000 people who saw them win the game in person, you say? And more than 40 million who watched it on TV? And you would have me believe that another 5 million showed up in downtown Chicago for a victory parade?

Big deal. It’s a conspiracy, folks! These Cub fans have colluded together to produce the biggest whopper since, well, since the day the disciples of Jesus claimed that He actually rose from the dead! In the immortal words of Vizzini, “Inconceivable!”

Now, that was quite a ruse, wouldn’t you say? Can you imagine a man coming back to life after having been crucified on a cross? Not likely. Do you know what crucifixion does to a man? It sucks his life right out of him. If you could devise the most torturous way to make a man suffer unbearable pain before killing him, you’d crucify him. And the Romans were experts at the craft.

No, there’s no way Jesus escaped that one. His fans likewise are delusional. They said He appeared to them alive and well three days after being killed. They say they touched Him, spoke with Him, and ate with Him. They say later He appeared to more than 500 people at one time. And then He was just “lifted up” to heaven in a cloud. Poof! He’s gone! “Beam me up, Scotty!”

That’s impossible. It never happened, people. Don’t be so naïve. Dead men don’t come back to life. And they don’t get beamed up to heaven.

Oh, and get this. They say He’s coming back someday as a King! Yeah, right. Like this one Jewish rebel-rouser who was tried by the authorities and convicted as a criminal is the “Savior of the world” and the “King of kings.” It’s foolishness. This is the biggest scam ever, and people are still falling for it!

The only way this could ever happen – and I mean, the only way – is if somehow God Himself came down from heaven and took on the flesh and blood of a man. Then I suppose He’d have authority to lay His life down, and He’d have authority to take it up again. I guess then it would be impossible for death to hold Him down. And I reckon the whole thing about Jesus being the “sacrifice for sins” and “the resurrection and the life” might actually make some sense.

If He were God then He would be the King of the world. He could have healed the sick, opened the eyes of the blind, and cleansed the lepers. He could have turned the water into wine, calmed the raging storm, and walked on the waves of the sea.

If He were God He could give everlasting life to whoever believes in Him. He could turn our mourning into joy. He could give rest to the weary, make beauty from ashes, and replace our darkest night of despair with a peace that passes all understanding.

But that sounds pretty ludicrous, doesn’t it? Just like the Chicago Cubs winning the World Series.

“For the word of the cross is folly to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God” (1 Corinthians 1:18).